It’s September 12th, a historic day in gay history. Why, you ask? We know that September 11th is a very historic occasion—the day Mariah Carey’s Glitter opened in New York, naturally—but what’s the story with September 12th?

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For Britney Spears fans, this is a day that will live in infamy forever. After regaining her freedom from her conservatorship and penning a best-selling memoir, Spears has reached another iconic milestone. She’s made her last child support payment to Kevin Federline, and fans couldn’t be more thrilled.

So to celebrate, they’re taking things to the next level.

From this point on, if Britney’s toxic ex-husband wants a Maserati, a hot body, or to party in France, he’ll have to put in some long, hard hours at the local GameStop. No more wining and dining on Britney’s dime!

And that, my fellow gays, is indeed something to celebrate.

The queen is free at last, and we couldn’t be happier to see her enemies suffer.

Let’s put “Work, B*tch” back on the charts!

Never before has so much been done with so little. That’s what happens when you combine charisma, uniqueness, nerve, and talent.

Just think of what she’s going to be able to do with all that extra cashish…

The people’s princess is finally free and clear of all outstanding debts. After a lifetime of working, a vacation from supporting jerks and leeches is exactly what our queen deserves.

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