Transitioning is a complex and unique journey from start to finish (if there’s ever truly a finish), but what are those little things from the start of transitioning that are so niche, they almost feel universal?

That’s the question trans folks are answering under a Reddit post titled, “Activities unique to the early trans experience.” The moments trans folks cited tended to fall into a handful of categories, like finding your unique identity…

  • “Trying out various nearly identical but subtly different voices to see what feels ‘right’ for your new forever voice.”
  • “Going through thousands of names to finally pick the one that is right for the new you.”
  • “Buying 5 million femme clothes from Goodwill, then getting rid of half of them after realizing I actually have taste beyond ‘I look feminine in this.’”

…discovering exciting (and not-so-exciting) new things about your body…

  • “Taking lots and lots of selfies (for many of us, for the first time ever)… and picking apart all of your flaws… over and over.”
  • “The first time I noticed my boobs looking bigger when I’m not wearing a bra.”
Related
Trans folks are asking: Do you want advice from your cis friends?
Trans folks are asking: Is it okay to be an ally out of spite?

…navigating coming out to friends and family…

  • “Having the most exciting, wonderful thing going on in your life and basically NOBODY wants you to talk about it. Or you can’t talk to anybody. Or you just need to hide it all.”
  • “Coming out to my mom for the first time because my boobs were exactly big enough that I [needed] to start wearing a bra and I didn’t know how to shop for them.”
  • “Having a longtime friend ask me out like right after my egg cracked.”

…and the trial and error making yourself feel the most you.

  • “Figuring out which pair of socks made the best shaped breast forms.”
  • “Tinted eyebrow gel on the peach fuzz of your upper lip 2 weeks on T.”

But through it all, knowing you’re on the right track, even when things aren’t easy. “Always worrying you made the wrong decision, even though you’re happier now, cause life just became hard mode,” as one commenter put it. “Yes, by the way, you did make the right decision if it is making you happier.”

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