These days, we’re dealing with a lot of backlash in the queer community, and it’s pretty depressing to deal with. But that’s why we have each other. Ideally, queer community exists so that we can protect each other from our enemies.
But what happens when the call is coming from inside the house?
That’s what queer creators had to contend with earlier this month, when one queer creator put out a series of videos that had everyone’s eyebrows raised. First, this creator explained in a video that it’s “not a hate crime” if people are just “not okay with the gay stuff.” Which…I mean it’s pretty hate crime adjacent?
He goes on to say that he “respects” people who don’t like gay people, and in a second, highly controversial video, he goes on to say that he doesn’t want his kids seeing him showing affection to another man because then those kids will think it’s “okay.”
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People obviously were not having it. First of all, it’s absolutely ok for kids to see queer adults expressing affection, in the same way that it’s fine for kids to see their straight parents kissing and holding hands. No one is talking about going any further than that!
If you recognize this “protect the children” rhetoric, it’s because it’s exactly the same points the religious right has tried to levy against us in recent years, and they’ve nearly succeeded in branding queer existence as somehow NSFW. We’re seeing that backlash now. But to hear these talking points coming from a queer creator is disturbing, and it’s no wonder that people are not having it.
“Everything you said could apply to a heterosexual relationship as well,” one creator replied in a stitch, explaining that yes, it is homophobic to feel that children need to be protected from seeing queer people express affection but not from straight people doing the same thing. “Everything you said in that video is absolutely internalized homophobia, because you at your big age are still not comfortable with being gay.”
And honestly, that’s the long and short of it.
“Self hating says are so sad,” one commenter wrote. “They will NEVER see the harm done because they have them types of people validate his skewed views of his own community.”
It’s hard to see people who are out but still, in certain ways, deep in the closet. And in general, it’s hard to feel anything but empathy for people still struggling with anti-gay self-hatred. But when those people come online and start talking about how it’s fine and respectful to openly be anti-gay, that’s when we have a problem.