2005 was dark time for gay people, but at least we had a movie that finally dared to show gay sex scenes, albeit in the mildest way possible. It truly can’t be underestimated just how exciting Ang Lee’s Brokeback Mountain adaptation was in a pre-Glee, pre-It Gets Better, pre-Prop 8 landscape. It gave us a tantalizing, realistic love story between two men who risked everything to be together. It gave us two hot dudes f*cking in a tent. And most importantly, it gave us the phrase “I can’t quit you.”

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But it could have been so much worse, as we’re just now learning.

According to a piece of intel from the estimable Film Updates Twitter account, famed jerk Mark Wahlberg was almost offered one of the main roles in the film. After a meeting with Ang Lee, however, Wahlberg confessed to getting the ick from the script’s detailed descriptions of gay sex.

And honestly, thank the gay gods for that, because nobody wanted to see Mark Wahlberg pretending to be gay for two hours.

This classic gay film was narrowly saved from Wahlbergification, and we couldn’t be more grateful. The wild west is NO place for a Boston accent!

Call us crazy, but maybe gay roles shouldn’t go to people who refer to gay sex as “the thing”…

Let’s also take this moment to remember that Wahlberg has been the instigator of several hate crimes, and somehow this very public knowledge hasn’t slowed down his career one bit.

Nobody needed a squeaky-clean version of Brokeback Mountain starring Mark Wahlberg, and it’s a small blessing that we never got it.

Thank heaven for small mercies.

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